Meet the parents.... a new chance for a proper family!

Soon after I moved in, Kev announced he wanted me to meet his family...well his words were "I want you to meet me mum!"  My heart skipped a beat.  I had never met anyone's parents before and only had my own parents' bad example to go by.  I knew I was at a sensitive time and I so much wanted them to like me!  When Kev and I first met, I got the impression he didn't see his parents much....but then as we got to know each other, I found it this wasn't his choice but his ex...he wanted to show me off.  We had to go out and get me some clothes since this was before I got my stuff back from my parents!  I had already become friends with Kev's mum on facebook and we had exchanged a few emails so I had a good feeling.


I was still worried....I didn't want them to think I was a headcase or that I came with too much baggage or that I was too young....or that I was just not nice.  I still remember the look of shock on Kevin's face when we got there.  He had said to me "if mum likes you, she'll hug you when we leave"....when we arrived, we were welcomed in and I promptly got a hug from his mum....I looked at Kev and gave him a thumbs up! :D  That started the day off well haha :)


Well, bearing in mind, I had always been shy and got nervous meeting lot of people at the same time.  I thought the 'meeting' would be Kev and I and his mum and dad (and his sister who lives with them)....well, in we walked and there was his mum, dad, one sister, another sister and her boyfriend, his aunt, niece and nephew!!!  Wow I didn't expect to meet so many all at once.  Kev is one of 6 children but I didn't realise just how big a family he had!  They were all lovely, it was a very successful meeting....and I got another hug when we left!!


I came to realise how having such a big family is so lovely...a real feeling of support.  Since I had been 11, there had only ever been the 5 of us in my 'family' - mum, dad, sister, me and Nanny so I never knew what it was like to be surrounded by family.  My father had had a big argument with my mothers parents and sister in 1995....eventually leading to a complete family split!  I lost my grandparents, aunt, uncle and 2 lovely cousins who were only 5 and 3 at the time.  But with my fathers controlling nature, that was probably his way of getting yet more control, of keeping the family very small, no other influence, no one to talk to!  That is why I had stayed for so long, I knew he wouldn't think twice about stopping me seeing Nanny Bess and I just couldn't face that.  Once she died, there was no reason for me to stay!  I had made my mind up that one day I would find my grandparents, aunt and cousins again....I had no idea when or how, I just hoped it would not be too late!!


Days and weeks past and I quickly found myself part of the family.  The Bruns' were unbelievable.  They all (who I had met by then LOL) were so incredibly welcoming and accepting.  There were no issues where I thought there would be, they were just so friendly, took me a while to get used to!  They had all been through so much heartache in their lives....with Cystic Fibrosis (CF), Kevin's youngest sister had died from CF at only 31, they had all watched so many friends die from CF over the years but still, they were the most positive, bright, loving family I had ever met!  And they made it clear, they wanted me to be part of their family.


Watching Kevin's dad Mick with his 'children' (all in their 40's when I met them) often bought a tear to my eye.  He was so warm and made it clear that his family were his life.  I tried to get rid of negative thoughts like "what did I do so wrong to get a dad like mine?!"  I started to see what a normal family life should be like.  Kev's sisters ring their parents everyday... because they WANT to not because they have to, they are friends!  Kev's niece rings her Nan (kev's mum) everyday because they are friends!  I had never seen a family like it. Heart warming!!  Even Kev's niece and nephew (the 2 I met that first day) were lovely and accepting, I had wondered if there would be problems since they are only a few years younger than me!!  But nothing, they soon started calling me 'Auntie Angie' which greatly shocked me!!  I started talking to Edna (Kev's mum) frequently and she was so lovely and supportive.  She asked questions about my past and at first, I was cagey, I didn't want her to go off me...but it soon became clear, she was interested and disgusted at my father.  She soon became the mother I never had...it only took weeks before I could talk to her about anything and everything including very personal subjects.....I had never got to that point with my own mother in 25 years!  My life was getting better and better!


One memory will stay with me forever, we went to his mum and dads again, I think his was second or third time and they took us out for a meal for Kev's birthday (the following week).  There were 6 of us around the table and I had never laughed so much!  I was part of the family! :) I had never realised before how much I craved being part of a family - a proper part of a proper family.  So simple but so important.  I felt wanted and accepted and loved! xxx